[songtekst] Liquid & Redemption
 

As I’m trapped inside this ancient glass & sand is rapidly falling
An unknown man comes walking in, for a dreamer he’s calling
And all my fears are vanished by a little wave of light
As he offers me to free the way to view the mystic sights
And I approve him to be my guide through silent nights & empty skies
So I gather my courage & gather my luck, as I throw my dice
Into the World of Liquid & Redemption.

Embraced with warmth along the way, while drums are bashed & horns are blown
The music drags a ball-‘n-chain, arrives as time has slowly flown
Senses mixed-up, fused beyond
The sublime crawls up my nose at dawn
Flashes of laughter & smell of Vermouth
As I recall my acts by the taste in my mouth
In the Land of Liquid & Redemption.

The clouds are struggling above my head - my guide has left without a word
Stranded & broke, while I speak of the Lord
As the colour of my skin now loses control & in search of a way
I’m unable to find as I damn the day
I ever arrived & followed my guide - in despair I had signed
As the hunger of truth now conquers my mind
In the City of Liquid & Redemption.

Het is mijn allereerste poging om ook maar íets op papier te zetten, dus kritieken zijn welkom.

Gebruik alsjeblieft geen "&" in je tekst, dat leest heel storend.
Zo snel gelezen lijkt het Engels okee. Vermouth/mouth vind ik een zwakke combo, en de gids komt te vaak terug in dezelfde woorden.

Verder heeft het wel wat hoor, ik vind de reeks World/Land/City of Liquid and Redemption leuk :)

Dankje voor je kritieken, je hebt wel gelijk.