Wil iemand mijn Engelse brief controleren?
 

Hallo Forumlezers,
Voor school moet ik een brief schrijven over mijn leven maar ik ben niet heel goed in Engels ik heb wat geschreven maar willen jullie misschien controleren?
Zou echt super zijn!
Groetjes..


Dear Elisabeth McGuire,

Thank you for you letter that you send me last month. I'm sorry that you haven't heard from me in a quite while. But i'm very busy with school. I have to do a lot of assignments, and learn very much for the test about a few weeks. I need good grades because I want to pass next year! But how are you? And at school (your grades, friends, teachers etc.)?

Well, I think that I go to the Christian Highschool in Ede, the study Psychiatric nursing. I would like to life on myself but that is still a dream. It costs a lot of money currently. But when it happen you should com, then we really enjoyed our time together. What (for study) are you going to do when you're passed next year? And what will you do this year in you (summer)holiday?

The 14th of July go my holiday start. I'm going work by a nursinghome in the city and by the wholesle Makro. This is for five weeks then I go on holiday! Me and my brother go with the plane on the 18th of August to Hungary. There we go celebrate two weeks our holiday. When we come back, the next day we have already go to school. Our final year!

When you come to Holland in the summer, you have to come tot me. And please say hello to your parents for me;)

I'm looking forward to your letter,
Yours sincerely!

Even een opmerking: de Christelijke Hogeschool is een HBO-instelling, maar dit soort onderwijs is buiten Nederland niet bekend. Je kunt Christelijke Hogeschool in dit geval het beste vertalen als Christian School For Higher Education.

Het is geen formele brief, dus (zoals ik hwb geleerd) schrijf je regards inplaats van yours sincerely komma en naam eronder.

Tussen I'm looking forward. .... en yours sincerely moet een regel tussen zitten.

Dankjulliewel!

Hier mijn nagekeken versie:

Dear Elisabeth McGuire,

Thank you for your letter that you send me last month. I'm sorry that you haven't heard from me for quite a while. But I've been very busy with school. I had to do a lot of assignments, and study a lot for the test in about a few weeks. I need good grades because I want to pass next year! But how are you? What about school? Have you got any good grades lately? Made new friends?

Well, I think that I go to the Christian Highschool in Ede, to study Psychiatric nursing. I would like to life on my own but that is still a dream. It currently costs a lot of money. But when it happens you should come to visit me, then we will really enjoy some time together. What kand of study are you going to do when you've passed next year? And what will you do this year for you (summer)holiday?

My holiday will start the 14th of July. I'm going work for a nursinghome in the city and for the wholesle Makro. This is for five weeks then I'll go on a holiday! Me and my brother will go to Hungary, using the plane on the 18th of August . There we will celebrate our two weeks of holiday. When we come back, the next day we have to go to school already. Our final year!

When you come to Holland this summer, you have to come and meet me. And please say hello to your parents for me!

I'm looking forward to your letter,

Yours sincerely!
//Opmerking: ik zou hier iets van "lots of love" van maken, aangezien dit een brief lijkt te zijn naar een vriend/vriendin
<JOU NAAM>

O oeps het is wel een informele brief, mijn excuses!

mijn versie voor wat het waard is :

Dear Elisabeth McGuire, (als het gaat om een vriend van je zou ik gewoon bij Elisabeth houden)
Thank you for youR letter that you did send to me last month. I'm sorry that you haven't heard from me for quite a while. But i'm very busy with school. I have to do a lot of assignments, and learn very much for the test in about a few weeks. I need good grades because I want to pass next year! What about you? And what about your school (your grades, friends, teachers etc.)?

Well, I think that I will go to the Christian Highschool in Ede, to study Psychiatric nursing. I would like to liVe on my own but that is currently still a dream. It costs a lot of money as you can imagine. But when it happenS you should comE to visit me, then we really could enjoy our time together. What kind of study are you going to do when you're passed next year? And what will you do this years [(summer)holiday?

My holiday will start on the 14th of July. I'm going work to work for a nursinghome in the city and by the wholesAle Makro. This is for five weeks then I go on holiday! Me and my brother go by plane to Hungary on the 18th of August . There we will celebrate our holiday for two weeks . When we come back, the next day we will have to go to school already. Our final year!

When you come to Holland during summer, you really should come to visit me. And please say hello to your parents for me

I'm looking forward to receive your letter,
Yours sincerely! Dit is te formeel, "kind regards" is al beter, maar "lots of love" of "cheers" nog beter.

enne ... je zegt dat als ze naar holland komt deze zomer dat ze dan jouw moet bezoeken zodat jullie samen kunnen genieten van de tijd met elkaar.
Maar dit is wel een beetje optimistisch, omdat je nu heel druk bent met je studie, daarna voor 5 weken lang 2 verschillende banen hebt, vervolgens op vakantie gaat met je broer en daarna de volgende dag weer naar school.

lijkt me niet zo heel gezellig voor die vriendin :D