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Harem

Phone never stops ringing
Voices never stop singing
Feet never stop dancing
All these people who call
Everyone wants a part of my day
A moment in my life
A chance to be in my dream
To be my dream

They all fall
So fast they go
No matter how much I warn them
Or how cold I am
Still they beg and plead for me
To catch them
Let them learn about me
Little do they really know
They ask to be condemned to hell
Burn in pain which replaced my soul.

Why would I let them
Why do I still care
Life fade into meaningless faces
I barely remember who I left in bed last night
Moving so fast
From one to another
Yet none of it even matters any longer

I'm going cold
Laugh at the fools
Life doesn't mean much
Nothing in it is important
A 5 year old told me I need to laugh more
I don't laugh enough
Then preceeded to spend the day on trying to make me laugh
A 5 year old
Now what 5 year old do you know who would even notice
Or understand so much
Or care enough to dedicate a day to caring
To laughter
To me
This means more to me then ever
Yet even this memory fades in the day
I almost cried one tear
But was easily distracted

Alcohol kills me
No longer even pretending to be in control
I don't care if I am here from one minute to the next
Guys..well they come and go
Some stay awhile
But eventually I will scare them all off
Those which are trying to stay
They have fallen hard
And hit the ground fast
They are just too wounded right now to leave
Prefering to stay miserable
Watching their dream go home with someone else
I should feel bad at play this game with them
But I don't
I warned them not to fall
They hit the ground hard
But I was burried under it long ago
And as special as you think I may be
Even a burried corpse can not catch a lost soul.

So call if you will
Party until I remember no more
Move from one guy to the next
Wait in line
I might get to you
Show me love
Which I will leave behind
Be pure in your heart
I'm drinking to stay blind.

Cry not one tear for me
When the day comes
Where the world stops
And I lay still
My phone still rings
But I no longer answer
My hand still on my bed
Eyes remain closed
Heart remains dead.