nieuwe Tool plaat

[Ce-El-Wan]

31 Mar 05

REMEMBER, DON”T KILL THE MESSENGER
You know the old saying, “no news is good news”, well… that was the case as far as the recording process was going for the new Tool CD, but now things may have changed a bit. Yesterday, when I went to the studio to give Maynard a bottle of wine (a 1992 Maya) for winning the bet that I had with him involving his new film “Sleeping Dogs Lie” (I lost by default, not being able to attend the Sedona screening), not only wasn’t Maynard there, but, in what seems to be a case of enantiodromia (something becoming its opposite) if ever there was one (!), I was told the reason why he wasn’t there. I wish this post was dated April 1, but, unfortunately, it isn’t. Like a doctor giving a patient a straight, honest answer to a medical diagnosis, without sugar-coating the truth, here’s exactly what I was told: “Maynard has found Jesus.” This will come as a complete shock to most (but not all) of you, as it did to me. In fact, it just seemed like another MJK prank until I talked to the one person who I believe would know if all this was legit or not. After nearly an hour on the phone with this person, the answer I received was that Maynard has indeed “found Jesus” and that, for this reason, he’s abandoned the project for the time being, if not entirely. I don’t know what the f**k is in the water these days, but hopefully a black jelly belly will turn up in that golden bowl… that’s all I can think to say at this point. Before leaving the studio, I watched as Danny made arrangements to go play some golf, while Adam and Justin kept working on a particular song. So, in case you missed it (those who don’t read the whole post), here’s today's news: Maynard has found Jesus…


www.toolband.com












wat denken we er van???

[Blenderhead]

te lange tekst...

[Lateralus]

wtf..
ik zet even the grudge op

[Master of Puppets]

[Ce-El-Wan]

btw.. Tool heeft een reputatie hoog te houden wat betreft 1 April.. dus ik ben benieuwd

[Faery]

wtf

[Lateralus]

Ce-El-Wan schreef op 01-04-2005 @ 22:55 :
btw.. Tool heeft een reputatie hoog te houden wat betreft 1 April.. dus ik ben benieuwd

njah.. ik kan het me ook haast niet voorstellen.. het zal vast wel iets met 1 april te maken hebben ja.. tenminste, ik hoop het

[Silent Enigma]

april fools

Silent Enigma schreef op 01-04-2005 @ 22:59 :
april fools

Jammer.

[Master of Puppets]

[Apocalyptica]

Hmm, daar maakt Jezus nou niet bepaald een goede beurt mee.

[Apocalyptica]

Op aperfectcircle.com zeggen ze trouwens niets, dus dat krikt het 1-april-grap-gehalte natuurlijk alweer een beetje op..

[Rollo Tomasi]

Die Blair is echt een natuurtalent in het uitkramen van debiele nonsens. Hoe moeilijk is het nou om een behoorlijke 1 april grap te maken?

[TommytheCat]

tijd voor een gospel tool plaat, me dunkt

Ce-El-Wan schreef op 01-04-2005 @ 22:55 :
btw.. Tool heeft een reputatie hoog te houden wat betreft 1 April.. dus ik ben benieuwd

Zo zijn ze ook een keer onder een versterker terecht gekomen

Jezus, ligt er beetje heel dik op lijkt me. Natuurlijk 1 april...

[Ce-El-Wan]

vorig jaar was Maynard dood

[the_spirit]

I have no idea how to introduce this, so I'll just post it. This is an email Maynard (the real one) sent in moments ago:

"hi, kabir. i thought it only fair to inform you first, before you hear it second or third hand. some recent events have led me to the rediscovery of jesus. tool will need to take the back seat. this may come as a shock. i just thought you should know considering all the support you given us over the years.

all my faith. maynard."

This is an actual email from actual MJK. I was going to type up a post about how the RIAA had sent us a letter shutting down The Tool Page (as this year's annual April Fools' Day joke), but now I just don't think it seems appropriate. More on this as it develops.

of het is echt waar
of ze hebben de fansite ook meegekregen en Maynard zit stiekem in een hoekje te giechelen...

het komrt btw van http://toolshed.down.net/

[Metal]

zz

Als morgen opeens die plaat in de winkel ligt vind ik het pas echt een goeie 1 april grap .

dan kan ik er denk ik wel om glimlachen

[Nighttime Bird]

the_spirit schreef op 02-04-2005 @ 23:12 :

of ze hebben de fansite ook meegekregen

Ik denk dat het andersom is hoor.

toolshed.down.net heeft elk jaar een 1 april-grap. Zat zelfs op 1 april gedurende de middag er af en toe te kijken of ie er al opstond, was wel benieuwd wat het deze keer zou zijn.

hmpff, flauw.

[damaetas]

Ce-El-Wan schreef op 01-04-2005 @ 22:32 :
I wish this post was dated April 1, but, unfortunately, it isn’t.

mja, als het geen 1-aprilgrap was/is dan ben ik even in de war

[86dagreed]

the_spirit schreef op 02-04-2005 @ 23:12 :
of het is echt waar
of ze hebben de fansite ook meegekregen en Maynard zit stiekem in een hoekje te giechelen...

het komrt btw van http://toolshed.down.net/

ach ze doen het elk jaar.
dat zelfs ome lennart erin tuint is dan wel weer grappig.

[Ce-El-Wan]

86dagreed schreef op 05-04-2005 @ 15:48 :
ach ze doen het elk jaar.
dat zelfs ome lennart erin tuint is dan wel weer grappig.

ehm.. friso, waarom denk je dat ik aan t einde post: wat denken we er van?

[TommytheCat]

"Christians, huh? So forgive me." - Bill Hicks

Good news, April fools fans. The writing and recording is back under way. When approached for comment on his recent encounter with the Son of God, Maynard said, "That guy's a punk!"
As it turns out, Maynard was out "location scouting" near the Fourth Street bridge in downtown Los Angeles when he "found Jesus."
"Turns out he was here the whole time, and not that difficult to find if you know where to look," Maynard reported. Apparently Jesus offered him the position of campaign manager for his new line of "Holier Than Thou" sparkling holy water, which Maynard of course accepted. What wasn't obvious was that this guy is a total drunk. It's an occupational hazard. Every time our Lord goes to get a glass of water, it transforms into a generic grocery store Merlot. Because the alcoholic is the Son of God and an all-knowing being, he knew of Maynard’s extensive interest in collecting wine. So he went to work trying to get his lips on it. Maynard caught J.C. in his cellar transforming his precious wine collection into urine, then pissing it into the empty "sparkling holy water" bottles for the eventual sale to all those people who bought, read, and embraced "The Celestine Prophesy." Tragic.
"Truth be told," Maynard confessed, "I wasn't feeling top notch when I found him. The evening prior to the day in question I had over-indulged in a series of bad Molotov shrimp cocktails with a side of Makers Mark and twin strippers. So after an entire night of G.I. Blowouts, hot/cold sweats, and blurred vision, it's very possible that the guy I met wasn't even Jesus at all. For all I know, it was Willem Dafoe."

www.toolband.com

[Rollo Tomasi]

TommytheCat schreef op 07-04-2005 @ 12:18 :
"Christians, huh? So forgive me." - Bill Hicks

Good news, April fools fans. The writing and recording is back under way. When approached for comment on his recent encounter with the Son of God, Maynard said, "That guy's a punk!"
As it turns out, Maynard was out "location scouting" near the Fourth Street bridge in downtown Los Angeles when he "found Jesus."
"Turns out he was here the whole time, and not that difficult to find if you know where to look," Maynard reported. Apparently Jesus offered him the position of campaign manager for his new line of "Holier Than Thou" sparkling holy water, which Maynard of course accepted. What wasn't obvious was that this guy is a total drunk. It's an occupational hazard. Every time our Lord goes to get a glass of water, it transforms into a generic grocery store Merlot. Because the alcoholic is the Son of God and an all-knowing being, he knew of Maynard’s extensive interest in collecting wine. So he went to work trying to get his lips on it. Maynard caught J.C. in his cellar transforming his precious wine collection into urine, then pissing it into the empty "sparkling holy water" bottles for the eventual sale to all those people who bought, read, and embraced "The Celestine Prophesy." Tragic.
"Truth be told," Maynard confessed, "I wasn't feeling top notch when I found him. The evening prior to the day in question I had over-indulged in a series of bad Molotov shrimp cocktails with a side of Makers Mark and twin strippers. So after an entire night of G.I. Blowouts, hot/cold sweats, and blurred vision, it's very possible that the guy I met wasn't even Jesus at all. For all I know, it was Willem Dafoe."

www.toolband.com

Okee, dat was dan wel weer grappig.

[damaetas]

das ni grappig, it's just a sorry excuse for a joke.