[EN] fouten verbeteren

Ik ben bezig met een research report en ik heb hier het volgende stuk voor getypt:

To optimize the marketing mix of Ben & Jerry’s, it is important to take a look at the 4 Ps. In this assignment, there is a special attention for the P of place. The other three P’s (price, product and promotion) are focussed on increasing the sales. The goal of distribution (place) is to take care of the fact that the product is available for the consumer in the right time and in the right place. In the United States of America, Ben & Jerry’s is available in more than 40 cities. In the Netherlands, the company has only 15 points of sales. There are differences with respect to the P of place between the United States of America and the Netherlands. The question is how far the Dutch consumer will go to get this product. Therefor, it is useful to collect information about this P, and try to find if this is the right P that has to be optimized.

Ik verwacht dat er wel enige fouten in zitten, omdat ik soms niet wist hoe ik het in het Engels moest verwoorden. Zou iemand zo vriendelijk willen zijn dit voor mij na te kijken c.q. verbeteren?

Lisanne schreef op 13-02-2006 @ 21:23 :
To optimize the marketing mix of Ben & Jerry’s, it is important to take a look at the 4 Ps. In this assignment, there is a ik zou 'a' weg laten special attention for the P of place. The other three P’s (price, product and promotion) are focussed on increasing the sales. The goal of distribution (place) is to take care of the fact that the product is available for the consumer at the right time and in the right place. In the USA , Ben & Jerry’s is available in more than 40 cities. In the Netherlands, the company has only 15 points of sales. There are differences with respect to the P of place between the USA and the Netherlands. The question is how far the Dutch consumer will go to get this product. Therefore , it is useful to collect information about this P, and try to find if this is the right P that has to be optimized.

ik hoop dat je er wat aan hebt

[Barry K]

Misschien kun je als eerste zin beter zeggen:

In order to optimize the marketing mix of Ben & Jerry's, it is important to look to the famous 4 Ps (of: we have to look to)

[Little Dutchess]

To optimize the marketing mix of Ben & Jerry’s, it is important to take a look at the 4 P' s. In this assignment, there is a special attention for the P of place. The other three P’s (price, product and promotion) focus on increasing the sales.

The goal of distribution (place) is to make sure that the product is available for the consumer at the right time and at the right place.

In the United States of America, Ben & Jerry’s is available in more than 40 cities nationwide . In the Netherlands, the company has only 15 points of sales.

There are differences with respect to the P of place between the United States of America and the Netherlands. The question is how far the Dutch consumer will go to get this product.
Therefore , it is useful to collect/gain information about this P, and try to find out if this is the specific P that has to be optimized.