engelse schrijfoefening

[1995ced]

Hallo,
Zou er iemand mijn schrijfoefening van engels willen verbeteren.
Ik denk dat er wel veel fouten in staan.
Alvast bedankt voor al de moeite!!!

Father murdered son:

A father (John) in Crete shot his 6-year-old son (Tyler) outside. The incident occurred nearby the capital city of Crete namely Heraklion about 6 a.m. It was friday the 16th November when a woman called her friend. The woman thought there was a robber in the garden of the neighbor. She notified the police and said she had seen a robber. The robber was dressed in black, wearing a ski mask and holding a shiny object in his hands. She said there was also another boy with the robber, she thought a child of six years. When the police was on the spot, they found a man sitting in the garden with a dead body of a six-years-old boy. His son lay dead on the grass. The man was armed with a knife. Tyler was a student at the New Crete High School, not far of the house where he was killed. The family has also another child, a girl of 14 years old. She was sleeping when there was the shooting. I heard a big noise, it was like an explosion, said the girl. I was scared and watched outside, it was a dramatic image. I can’t never forget it. The father was arrested, he was under influence of drugs and alcohol.
The reason about the shooting is unknown. A neighbor said that the father was furious about his son. The relation between the two was sometimes terrible. There were fights between the father and Tyler.
The father accused of murdering 6-year-old son Tyler has been remanded in custody. In the court John appeared on the verge of tears. His appearance at the court yesterday was the first time he has been seen in public. As the police arrived with John, people shouted and threw with vehicles to the bus. There were two people arrested. John was very emotional when the charge was read out, he answered ‘yes’ with a trembling voice and hands. When his name was read out, he answered ‘that’s ride, I’m guilty.” John was wearing a blue sweater during the jurisdiction. He did not eye contact with the public. There was a media presence at the court.
Thursday, hundreds friends were at the dramatic place where the accident had happened. Today at ten o’clock, it is the funeral of Tyler in Heraklion. A lot of classmates will be present at the funeral.
There are a lot of people feel a strong feeling of connection with the family. The mayor of Heraklion expressed his condolence with the family and friends of Tyler.
John is under psychiatric treatment. The judge said that he is mental illness.

[1995ced]

1995ced schreef:

Hallo,
Zou er iemand mijn schrijfoefening van engels willen verbeteren.
Ik denk dat er wel veel fouten in staan.
Alvast bedankt voor al de moeite!!!

Father murdered son:

A father (John) in Crete shot his 6-year-old son (Tyler) outside. The incident occurred nearby the capital city of Crete namely Heraklion about 6 a.m. It was friday the 16th November when a woman called her friend. The woman thought there was a robber in the garden of the neighbor. She notified the police and said she had seen a robber. The robber was dressed in black, wearing a ski mask and holding a shiny object in his hands. She said there was also another boy with the robber, she thought a child of six years. When the police was on the spot, they found a man sitting in the garden with a dead body of a six-years-old boy. His son lay dead on the grass. The man was armed with a knife. Tyler was a student at the New Crete High School, not far of the house where he was killed. The family has also another child, a girl of 14 years old. She was sleeping when there was the shooting. I heard a big noise, it was like an explosion, said the girl. I was scared and watched outside, it was a dramatic image. I can’t never forget it. The father was arrested, he was under influence of drugs and alcohol.
The reason about the shooting is unknown. A neighbor said that the father was furious about his son. The relation between the two was sometimes terrible. There were fights between the father and Tyler.
The father accused of murdering 6-year-old son Tyler has been remanded in custody. In the court John appeared on the verge of tears. His appearance at the court yesterday was the first time he has been seen in public. As the police arrived with John, people shouted and threw with vehicles to the bus. There were two people arrested. John was very emotional when the charge was read out, he answered ‘yes’ with a trembling voice and hands. When his name was read out, he answered ‘that’s ride, I’m guilty.” John was wearing a blue sweater during the jurisdiction. He did not eye contact with the public. There was a media presence at the court.
Thursday, hundreds friends were at the dramatic place where the accident had happened. Today at ten o’clock, it is the funeral of Tyler in Heraklion. A lot of classmates will be present at the funeral.
There are a lot of people feel a strong feeling of connection with the family. The mayor of Heraklion expressed his condolence with the family and friends of Tyler.
John is under psychiatric treatment. The judge said that he is mental illness.

Zou er iemand kunnen helpen?
Dank u wel!

[bloodyb]

Valt wel mee hoor dacht ik. Neighbor moet volgens mij met ou. When the police CAME to the spot. Not far FROM the house. She was sleeping DURING the schooting. I can never forget it OF i can't ever forget it. The reason FOR the shooting. Has been remanded in custody moet zijn remanded in custody. He answered 'thats RIGHT'. He did not HAVE eye contact. Hundreds OF friends. There are a lot of people who have a strong feeling. The judge said that he is mentally ill.
Volgens mij was dat het zo'n beetje.

[1995ced]

bloodyb schreef:

Valt wel mee hoor dacht ik. Neighbor moet volgens mij met ou. When the police CAME to the spot. Not far FROM the house. She was sleeping DURING the schooting. I can never forget it OF i can't ever forget it. The reason FOR the shooting. Has been remanded in custody moet zijn remanded in custody. He answered 'thats RIGHT'. He did not HAVE eye contact. Hundreds OF friends. There are a lot of people who have a strong feeling. The judge said that he is mentally ill.
Volgens mij was dat het zo'n beetje.

Dank u wel!

[bloodyb]

Remanded in custody moet zijn remained in custody.