unfinished

[Gleipnur]

Buttons I don’t know anything about. There must be a story to tell about everything they cause. When you push them. Push one. Go ahead. The result may be beautiful, sparkly and red. I don’t want this song to end just yet. I don’t want to go to sleep. Mummy! They yelled inexhaustible. For a button had been pushed and what followed was the flood of the city with beautiful red lava. And then, there was nothing but comfortable nothingness and all felt very sane and kind of numb. Floating. A piano’s playing outer space tunes, the sound seems to be coming from outside. What on earth is outside? What lives there? They could’ve been scratching their heads for a second, but they didn’t, as their minds were weightless just like their thoughts. One of them is me. I’m gazing at a pinkish screen which reminds me of supermarket yogurt in small glass bowls. I used to feel bad about the empty bowls cause of their purposelessness. Actually I didn’t care for them, but they reminded me of my own mortality. I was not that kind of child that used to think about dying all the time. Well, I once was. I guess surviving every day all the time made me less suspicious and aware. And than this happens! Unlike in cartoons, you fall when you know you’re not supposed to be looking down, so you look straight ahead of you almost actually believing you’ll make it but still you crash down, cause it’s not a cartoon, remember. The reason of this interaction with myself in a future state of mind is caused by my dear habit of always trying to be one step ahead of it. It paid after all. I told you it would. And I told you so many other things I can’t remember. How convenient. Lets take a break now and watch the earth from a distance. Yeah, I know, it’s been done, but can’t we just pretend we invented every next move we do? Sure we can. After all, there’s no-one to tell us we can’t. Maybe I could just as well tell you now. There’s never been anyone else. You don’t seem to be surprised…why aren‘t you putting up a drama scene? I…always kind of knew. But, the moment was perfect. Can I see the script? What script? There is n… Oh, the script! Why, what is it to you? It doesn’t matter now. So, you can just as well let me in on a peek. I think we’re in a dead end. Oh, I’m sorry, did I do that? You’ve always asked too many questions at a time. It’s my nature. Forget nature. No such thing, they’ve been telling you stories haven’t they? What stories? Never mind. Am I stuck with you forever now? What ever happened to emotional distance? We’re running I circles can’t you see? Evolution used to fix that bugger. Yeah, those were the days… You’re not supposed to feel such humanlike nostalgia… Is it serious? It could be. It’d be darn ironic if so. But it will be okay as soon as I morph into oblivious limbo right?