Laartjuh!
Dit is een verhaal en geen gedicht. Ben het niet mee eens dat hier verhalen horen, daar zijn andere fora voor. Niet dat ik het heel erg vind om een leuk verhaaltje op zijn tijd te lezen.
Wel aardig, helaas vol met fouten.
Sommigen daarvan zoals:
medow=>meadow
curiousity => curosity
brush = een kwast, bush = bosje
Zijn nogal storend omdat ze zo vaak terug komen. Omdat er zoveel spelfouten en gramaticale fouten inzaten, heb ik het even snel herschreven. Je moet zelf maar beide versies met elkaar vergelijken. Als je iets niet snapt of hulp nodig hebt email me.
x-je
SounD
nieuwe versie:
A lone fawn surveys the meadow
Sniffing the warm morning air
Noticing the birds starting to stir
It is such a young fawn
Its mother long gone
Alone now in this world
It stands on the edge of the meadow
Hidden behind some bushes
Always watching
Always waiting........
The bear walks noisily through the bush(es?)
Munching on whatever catches its eye
Bear enjoys the warm sun of the day
Lazily he chases a butterfly
Leading (him) out into a meadow.........
The fawn sees the bear
Instinct tells her to turn and run
Yet curiosity keeps her feet still
She watches him play
Longing to join in his carefree ways
She sees the sun make his black fur look shiny and silky soft
An urge to touch this fur
Makes her take one unconscious step closer and then another...
The bear oblivious of his audience
Continues bounding (geen idee wat je hiermee bedoeld) through the meadow
Now chasing the rabbit it scared from it's hiding spot
The bear trots closer to the forest edge...
The fawn watches the bear play carelessly with the rabbit
Not hurting it
But playing roughly
The bear just doesn't understand it's own strength
Maybe I could teach him.............
Still her feet move closer
Until she is out in the open/ out of hiding and past the forest edge
Now the fawn stands in the meadow
So close to the bear.........
SuRprised at this intruder
The bear stops playing with the limp rabbit
He stares at this dumb fawn
How dare she watch him (erg lelijke zin)
This is the most feared animal of this forest
And she caught him playing like a cub
In outrage he roars
And charges.....
Seeing the sudden change of mood
The fawn looks at the now dead rabbit
And at the charging bear
Fear leaps into her eyes
Instinct wins from curiosity
Turning she runs (beetje twijfelachtig of je omdraaiend kan rennen)
But not before she feels his claws scrapE across her back
Still she runs
Fear giving her added speed and strength
Crashing through young/thin trees and bushes
The bear is unable to keep up with her in the forest, due to his size and lack of speed.
Still she runs.......
Even after the bear has given up
She runs
Forever scarred because of her stupid curiosity
Never again will she distrust her instincts
At a hint of interest she runs........ (ik snap het gebruik van interest hier niet)
Until she dies one day
Alone.............
__________________
SounD of Silence
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