(EN) Formele brief nakijken

[Spare123]

Ik heb dus een opdracht voor engels, ik zal vertellen hoe die gaat.

Now you've warmed up your writing skills you will write a full letter this time you will write a more formal letter. Just like Pink's open letter to President Bush, you will wirte an (imaginary) one to him as well.

1) Start your letter with 'Dear Mr President' and close it with 'Yours sincerely'
2) Your intention is not to write a fully political letter and criticise the President's actions though you can politely ask him to explain certain views.
3) You will also include something positive about the U.S.
(remember: you want him to finish reading the letter!) and invite him to visit Holland in the near future.
4) Don't forget to introduce yourself and explain your reason for writing.
5) To help you a bit more have a look at the communication Toolbox below.
6) you must use in between 200-220 words.

de brief:

NAAM
STRAAT
PLAATS
Holland

Mr President Bush
The White House
Washington
Amerika

24 March 2007

School assignment

Dear Mr President

I would like to ask you some questions about how you run the U.S .
My name is NAAM and I live in Holland .
The reason I write you this letter is for a school assignment (as seen in the subject of this letter) , because I want to learn a lot more about your country , I did ask our Minister-President (J.P. Balkenende) and he said to me: “write the letter directly to Mr President Bush.”
I know it’s a heavy job you have, but can you explain to me, what you would do if a country starts attacking you?
In my opinion I would talk to that country, in contrast to a President who begins the war with fighting, and talk afterwards.
How can you let the other Presidents in there values, but still not trying to go in war with that country? Aren’t you afraid, if you make him angry that he will start a war with your country?
Hopefully I will get a reply from you , but more than that it would be nice if you could come to Holland and explain it to us all.
Finally I thank you in advance for looking to my letter. Hopefully you have the time to write me back, or maybe I’ll see you soon .

Yours sincerely ,
NAAM

zouden jullie deze brief willen nakijken

Mr President Bush
The White House
Washington
Amerika

24 March 2007

School assignment

Dear Mr President

I would like to ask you some questions about how you run the United States of America. (In formele brieven zo min mogelijk afkortingen gebruiken.)

My name is NAAM and I live in the Netherlands.

I wrote you this letter because of a school assignment, as seen in the subject of this letter. I want to learn a lot more about your country. I did ask our Prime Minister, named Jan-Peter Balkenende, and he told me to write a letter directly to president Bush. (indirecte rede past hier beter, denk ik) I know you have a hard job, but can you explain to me, what you would do if a country starts attacking you? (Yours past hier misschien beter, 'uw land')

Personaly, I would talk to that country's leader, in stead of a president who begins the war with fighting, and then talks afterwards. (How can you let the other Presidents in there values, but still not trying to go in war with that country?)<- (hele vage zin, wat probeer je te zeggen? Hoe behoud je respect voor andere presidenten maar probeer je tegerlijkertijd niet met hen in oorlog te raken??) Aren't you afraid that, if you make them angry, that they will start a war with the United States?

Hopefully I will get a reply from you. However, it would be better if you could come to the Netherlands and explain it to us all.

Finally, I would like to thank you for reading my letter. Hopefully you have the time to write me back, or maybe I will see you soon.

Yours sincerely,
NAAM



Alstublief. Er zullen vast nog genoeg fouten in zitten want ik ben op dit moment redelijk geintoxiceerd. Bedenk voortaan wel dat je afkortingen in formele brieven beter niet kan gebruiken en dat er achter een woord geen spatie hoeft voordat je een leesteken plaatst. Probeer ook die ene zin nog even te veranderen omdat die totaal niet in de context past.

Groet,
NAAM2.

[mathfreak]

*ik geef hieronder de tekst met de nodige correcties weer*
NAAM
STRAAT
PLAATS
Holland/The Netherlands

Mr President Bush
The White House
Washington
United States of America/U.S.A.

24 March 2007

Subject: School assignment

Dear Mr President

I would like to ask you some questions about how you run the U.S./U.S.A.
My name is NAAM and I live in Holland/the Netherlands.
The reason I write you this letter is for a school assignment (as seen in the subject of this letter), because I want to learn a lot more about your country.
*Ik heb hier de zin afgesloten omdat de zin anders te lang zou worden. Denk er om dat je leestekens als punten en dergelijke altijd aan de woorden vastschrijft waar ze bij staan.*
I did ask/asked our Prime Minister (J.P. Balkenende) and he said to me: “write the letter directly to Mr President Bush.”
I know it is a heavy job you have, but can you explain to me what you would do if a country starts attacking you?
*in een formele brief mogen geen samentrekkingen als it's, can't en dergelijke voorkomen, in een informele brief kan dat wel*
In my opinion I would talk to that country, in contrast to a President who begins the war with fighting, and talks afterwards.
How can you leave the other Presidents in their values/let the other Presidents keep their dignity, but still not trying to go into war with their country?
*there (daar) en their (hen) worden wel hetzelfde uitgesproken, maar betekenen niet hetzelfde*
Are you not afraid that they will start a war with your country if you make them angry?
*omdat je een meervoud (Presidents) gebruikt dien je ook de meervoudsvormen van de persoonlijke en de bezittelijke voornaamwoorden te gebruiken*
I hope I will get a reply from you, but more than that it would be nice if you could come to Holland/the Netherlands and explain it to us all.
*hopefully is een bijwoord dat hoopvol betekent, hopelijk vertaal je als "it is to be hoped (that)", maar je kunt beter I hope gebruiken*
Finally I thank you in advance for looking to my letter.
I hope you have the time to write me back, or maybe I will see you soon.

Yours sincerely,
NAAM