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		tis een heel erg triest gedicht voelde me toen owk heel erg kut tis wel allemaal fantasie maar de druppels rolde tog wel over mun wangen...
 You lay there
 Sweat on your brow from the effort to remain silent
 Not scream out your pain
 Your eyes they beg me to help you
 I have done all I could
 The doctor gave you pain medication already
 But it hasn't worked in awhile
 Your starting your last stages
 The cancer spreading throughout your wasted body
 Frail bones where muscle should be
 I hate seeing someone once so full of life
 Reduced to this
 You did everything
 Chemo, radiation, medications
 Nothing worked
 The cancer spread faster then even the doctor's thought it would
 You went through everything you did
 Because I asked you to
 To try and fight this disease
 To not leave me
 Now you ask me
 To help you
 Your body not strong enough to do it on your own
 You whisper to me
 
 Please....let me die.....help me die......please....it hurts...too much now...
 
 A tear passes my strength
 I made you suffer this long
 I made you lose your beautiful hair
 And learn to life life in pain
 To throw up everything you eat
 To see visually the structure of your frame
 I asked you to suffer all of this
 For me
 So I would not lose you
 You did it to
 You tried your best
 You can't survive this
 You asked me for one this in return
 
 Let me die.......help me die...
 .
 How can I deny you?
 Yet how can I kill you?
 How could you ask me to?
 How could I condemn you to suffering like this?
 A moan escapes your lips
 
 Please....
 
 I nod
 Tears in my eyes
 I go and grab my insulin
 I fill the needle full
 It saves the life of diabetics like me
 But even a little bit can kill a non diabetic like you
 I fill a second needle
 Then a third
 I take then to you
 You see what I have planned
 Are you sure?
 My last plea to change your mind
 You nod your head
 
 Please.........Help me die
 
 I inject one, two, three into your leg
 The insulin takes approximately 30 mins to work for non diabetics
 I sit by your side
 Start talking to you
 Telling how much I love you
 How sad I will be without you
 How brave you have been through it all
 How sorry I am to make you go through this
 You listen to every word
 Squeezing my hand tighly
 Silencing me
 
 No regrets...........don't blame.....yourself........
 You helped me.......set me free.....of pain
 Thank you.....
 
 Your body starts to shake
 Your eyes take on a confused look
 The insulin has started coming to the end of your sugar supply
 Time starts to draw near
 
 Promise me........don't tell.............never...........promise....
 
 My eyes widen with horror
 
 Please........promise.....
 Finally I nod...
 
 I promise
 Your eyes start to shut
 
 Thank you..........thank...
 
 Were your last words
 Your hand goes limp and still in mine
 Sobbing I grab your body
 Pull it close to mine
 Screaming
 
 NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.....
 
 I stay holding you close
 The doctors come rushing in
 Then seeing that you are gone
 They leave again
 Giving me my moment of grief
 They don't know I killed you
 They just think that you died on your own
 They don't know..........
 My tears stop
 I remember my promise made in your last moments of death
 It was unfair of you to make me promise that
 But it was unfair of me to make you go through what you did
 You kept your promise to try everything
 I'll keep mine
 To not tell
 My eyes dry now
 I leave the room
 Letting the nurses prepair the body
 My eyes dry
 And dead.........
 
 
	__________________
	Sorry, Was I screaming again? |