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Uit Pihkal over 2c-b:
(with 16 mg) A day at the Stanford museum. Things were visually rich, yet I felt that I was reasonably inconspicuous. The Rodin sculptures were very personal and not terribly subtle. I saw Escher things in the ceiling design, when I decided to sit in a foyer somewhere and simply pretend to rest. Walking back, the displays seen in the bark of the eucalyptus trees, and the torment and fear (of others? of themselves?) in the faces of those who were walking towards us, were as dramatic as anything I had seen in the art galleries. Our appetites were enormous, and we went to a smorgasbord that evening. A rich experience in every possible way.
(with 20 mg) The drug effect first became known to me as a shift of colors toward golden and rose tones. Pigments in the room became intensified. Shapes became rounder, more organic. A sensation of lightness and rivulets of warmth began seeping through my body. Bright lights began pulsing and flashing behind my closed lids. I began to perceive waves of energy flowing through all of us in unison. I saw all of us as a gridwork of electrical energy beings, nodes on a bright, pulsating network of light. Then the interior landscape shifted into broader scenes. Daliesque vistas were patterned with eyes of Horus, brocades of geometric design began shifting and changing through radiant patterns of light. It was an artist's paradise--representing virtually the full pantheon of the history of art.
(with 20 mg) The room was cool, and for the first hour I felt cold and chilled. That was the only mildly unpleasant part. We had been hanging crystals earlier that day, and the visions I had were dominated by prismatic light patterns. It was almost as if I became the light. I saw kaleidoscopic forms--similar to, but less intense than, when on acid--and organic forms like Georgia O'Keefe flowers, blossoming and undulating. My body was flooded with orgasms-- practically from just breathing. The lovemaking was phenomenal, passionate, ecstatic, lyric, animal, loving, tender, sublime. The music was voluptuous, almost three-dimensional. Sometimes the sound seemed distorted to me, underwater like. This was especially so for the less good recordings--but I could choose to concentrate on the beauty of the music or the inadequacy of the sound's quality, and mostly chose to concentrate on the beauty.
(with 24 mg) I am totally into my body. I am aware of every muscle and nerve in my body. The night is extraordinary--moon full. Unbelievably erotic, quiet and exquisite, almost unbearable. I cannot begin to unravel the imagery that imposes itself during the finding of an orgasm. Trying to understand physical/spiritual merging in nature --.
Uit Pihkal over 2c-t-7:
(with 20 mg) A wonderful day of integration and work. Took about 2 hours for the onset. Some nausea on and off-- that seemed to cycle periodically throughout the day. Visuals were great, much like mescaline but less sparkly. Lots of movement and aliveness--velvety appearance and increased depth perception. Neck and shoulder tension throughout the day along with legs. I would periodically notice extreme tightness of muscles, and then relax. Working was very integrative. Back and forth constantly between wonderful God-space--similar to MDMA but more grounded--then always back to sadness. I felt that it really showed me where I was unfinished, but with self-loving and tolerance. Tremendous processing and letting go. Seeing things very clearly and also able to laugh at my trips. Lots of singing. In spite of shoulder tension, vocal freedom and facility were very high. I felt my voice integrated and dropped in a way it never had before, and that remained for several days. Able to merge body, voice, psyche and emotions with music and then let go of it as a role. I also realized and gave myself permission to do whatever it takes to get free. I let go of Dad with tragic arias. The next day I let go of Mom by singing Kaddish for her, and merging with it.
(with 20 mg) I lay down with music, and become engrossed with being as still as possible. I feel that if I can be totally, completely still, I will hear the inner voice of the universe. As I do this, the music becomes incredibly beautiful. I see the extraordinary importance of simply listening, listening to everything, to people and to nature, with wide open receptivity. Something very, very special happens at the still point, so I keep working on it. When I become totally still, a huge burst of energy is released. And it explodes so that it takes enormous effort to quiet it all down in order to be still again. Great fun.
(with 25 mg) This was a marvelous and strange evening. This 2C-T-7 is good and friendly and wonderful as I remember it. I think it is going to take the place of 2C-T-2 in my heart. It is a truly good material. I got involved with a documentary on television. It was about certain people of Bolivia, people living in the high mountains and about a small village which--perhaps alone among all the places in the country--maintains the old Inca ways, the old traditions, the old language. Which is, I gather, against the law in Bolivia. It showed a yearly meeting of shamans and it was quite clear that hallucinogens played a major part in this meeting. The shaman faces, male and female, were startling in their intensity and earthy depth. The Virgin Mary is worshipped as another version of the ancient Pacha Mama, the Earth Mother. Wonderful dark, vivid look at places and people who are not usually to be seen or even known about.
(with 30 mg) The visuals have an adaptable character to them. I can use them to recreate any hallucinogenic substance I have known and loved. With open eyes, I can go easily into LSD flowing visuals, or into the warm earth world of Peyote, or I can stop them altogether. With closed eyes, there are Escher-like graphics with a lot of chiaroscuro, geometric patterns with oppositional play of sculptured light and dark values. Green light.
Klinkt goed, n'est-ce pas?
Laatst gewijzigd op 26-04-2005 om 12:29.
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